Muse

The street was crowded

and at every corner

I turned and

thought of the muse

that shimmered

like a diamond

soaked fog

on the San Francisco Bay

I used to sit there and watch

the still shots of

life surrounding me

a long time ago, it seems

but it wasn't

it's like painting a picture

something always escapes,

an elusive detail robbing

the canvas

colors run together slowly making

life of what was just

gray matter

moving fast forward, I stop the

train and turn to look over

The palette

it almost had me thinking otherwise

but it made perfect sense.

 Painting by Mark Rothko

Still

I wonder, I wonder

I move and sometimes the air

Moves with me

I see you

I look up

I see your eyes

And wonder about the way

I shift in my shoes

As your pupils gaze at me

I become deaf and realize you've been talking to me

I wonder what you would do

If I put my finger on your cheekbone

Under your eyes

Looking at me

And traced down the map of your face

Until you stopped me

I'd feel your neck too

I wonder what you'd do

If my hand came home to your lower back

And pressed you hard against me

I think I'd stop wondering

I could feel the blood like Siamese twins

Between us

And now you've finished talking

And look at me that way

The pinpoints of your eyes

Caress mine as time is frozen for one, two seconds

It's hard to tell

It's so still

And so are you

 Alex Grey - Kissing 1983

Empty

Empty was how I felt

Flat as a crepe

Without the filling

I blessed the floor

For it kept me in one place

Even as I walked

Baby steps I hoped

For a love like you

To fill me

Like an empty container

Waiting in the closet

For some cold hands

To touch it

Eagerly anticipating

The drink

Greatness

I'm lying down seeing you/ as you smile at me/ your strength and ego are not the same/ I run to you with longing/ so precise it removes any doubt/ about what you and I are feeling/ I know when I write words/ they like a great love/ are always and forever bound/ by trees as paper/ turning yellow with age/ I can only hope to be with you similarly long/ living side by side/ with all of life's pleasures/ like a blue sky crisp in winter/ reflected in the snow on a lake/ I saw long ago/ I took a chance/ on standing in the frozen wilderness/ thinking this could end/ this could crack/ but I'd rather try anyway/ than forever live with wondering/ what could have been/ my feet slipped over the crystalline surface/ moving with freedoms long left behind / full of exhilaration/ brought me to the highest place/ just like your love/ I'm free but I choose/ to be encased in your sphere of passion/ and I see that life is suddenly/ beautifully real/ all the pain/ all the magic/ all the possibility/ I also see that/ in all this time/ I have been the one stopping myself/ from greatness.